If You Thought My Blog Would Become More Intelligent In The New Year… You Were Quite Wrong.

365 days.

8,760 hours.

525,600 minutes.

31,536,000 seconds.

1 year.

How did you spend all of that time? Because it sure is a lot. You could accomplish plenty in that span, and you could also waste a lot of it. A lot of things could happen over the course of one year. Good things. Bad things. All things in between.

Everyone experiences their ups and downs throughtout an entire year. Those ups, they’re great. Like that one weekend you spent with your friends in that awesome place. The downs, they suck. Like that time that person did so-and-so to you. Sucks.

But it isn’t the ups and downs that shape our year. It’s how we let it impact us. Because those ups and downs only last a short while, but the memories will linger not only for the remainder of the year, but for the remainder of your life.

Alright, I don’t want to get all philosophical here. My New Years was quite excellent. Although personally, I think New Years is quite overrated. While it is fun to reflect on how your year personally went, the day itself is a little overly hyped. It’s usually planned way in advance, and thus you have high expectations. But it’s really just like any other day. To me, it’s just an excuse to get drunk. Are we supposed to feel different when the clock strikes 12:00 AM, officially kicking off the new year?  This is my thought process as the year draws to an end:

11:55 pm: Oh man, five minutes away! Time to put on New Year’s Rockin’ Eve! Oh, what the fuck?! Ryan seacrets hosts this now? God dammit. Just what I always wanted, to have Ryan Seacrest’s face be the first thing I see upon entering the new year. Half of the celebrities in the world died this year, and Ryan Seacrest still lives? C’mon!

11:56 pm: The ball is starting to move! Very slowly. Why do people feel the need to kiss at midnight? That seems very cliché to me. I want punch somebody in the face at midnight. Can you think of a worse way to enter a year than getting punched in the face? That person would have a great story to tell for the rest of their lives. Now who to punch…

11:57 pm: Alright, let’s get this thing moving already.  Where’s my beer? I was just holding it. Then I put it down for a second. Is this one it? No, that’s empty. I think it was a bud light. Or maybe coors. Ugh, there’s Ryan Seacrest again.  Go away. Ooh, somebody’s passing out champagne. I wonder what Dana Carvey is doing at this exact moment.

11:58 pm: Nice, I found my beer. At least I think it’s mine. Who cares. Alright, where were we? Two minutes away.  Shit, I still haven’t made a resolution. What do I want to accomplish this year? Drink less? Hahaha. I crack myself up sometimes.

11:59 pm: One minute away! Wooooh! The last minute of 2009! Wow I am really drunk. 45 seconds. Ball is dropping faster and faster. Remember the show Pete and Pete? 30 seconds. Yea this beer definitely was not mine. 15 seconds. So close! I wonder who’s hosting Saturday Night Live this week? I hope it’s Emilio Estevez. Oh shit, focus David… 5…4…3…2…1…

12:00 am: YAAAAAY! WOOOOOOH! AWDGBVHJEDVAJHDBVAWEJBAJWJ! NEW YEARS! I don’t even know who you are but let’s hug!

12:01 am: …now what?

It is still a little fun to watch the ball drop, I’ll give you that. However, now that we have reached a new decade, I think it is time to alter the tradition a little. The ball needs a new look. For the 2011 New years, celebration, I suggest the ball be modified to look like this:

Now wouldn’t that be so much better?

Alright, folks. It’s a new decade, and this blog will continue to run strong. New Year, same awesomeness. 2010 is oficially upon us, and we can only hope that something terrible doesn’t happen to Ryan Seacrest.

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