So this blog is slowly becoming more and famous. It’s only been about a month and a half, but already random people are stopping me on the street and telling me to keep up the good work. I can’t go anywhere without having to sign an autograph, and mothers keep asking me if I could kiss their babies. Trust me, it’s lot less weirder than when I use to kiss people’s babies BEFORE I started the blog.
Soon enough, my blog will be the go-to source for news and entertainment. Google, Yahoo, and TMZ will be irrelevant. By the way, does anybody actually know what heck TMZ stands for?! I’ve been wondering that for a long time. I also wonder how a trampoline works.
Just remember that you, my loyal followers, are the ones that started it all. Without you all I would not have had the will to keep going. In light of my tremendous success, I encourage everybody to go for their dreams, regardless of silly they may seem. If you want to be a tap-dancer, go for it! If you want to be a air conditioner salesmen, do it! If you want to be a bullfighter, well actually that you should probably not do. Kinda dumb.
And you all don’t need to worry, when I’m famous and a big deal, and I mean even more of a big deal than I am now, I will still remember you all. I will not let the fame get to my head. I won’t go clubbing every night and make it rain at strip clubs. I mean, I do that stuff already. Except right now I can only afford to make it rain nickels. It hurts a little bit too, actually, when all the nickels come back down on your head. Or when they hit somebody else in the head. They don’t like that.
Rumor has it that they’re looking to make a movie about the history of the Weinblog. Supposedly I am going to be played by Macauley Culkin. Interesting casting choice, but I thought he did a great job in Home Alone, so I will not complain.
I figure I’ll give it another few weeks, then I’ll be able to quit my day-job… which is pretty much non-existent anyway, so that doesn’t really change anything.
To sum up, the Weinblog has been a huge success, and it’s only going to get bigger. It will be the biggest thing since Justin Bieber. I will rule the internet, and then I will be the king of the world. Then I will come down from my acid trip and realize that this blog appeals to maybe like ten people.
But I still love it!