Hey… Everybody’s Graduating!!!

How do I know this?

Because I can’t go ten minutes without somebody updating their newsfeed to say something along the lines of “OmG… last class ever!!!” or “I can’t believe I’m graduating!” or “one more test and then I’m done!!!”

My response:

Yes, it’s mid-May, and this is when school ends. It’s been that way… forever. People graduate. It is not uncommon.

If you’re 12 years old and you’re graduating college right now; then you’ve accomplished something. You have every right to brag about it in everyone’s face. Because that would be special.

But you know, if you’re 22 and a graduating undergrad… or 24/25 and graduating from grad-school, then… it’s not really impressive at all. In fact, if you weren’t graduating around this time, then you’re just a dumbass.

Or if you’re graduating from med-school or getting your PHD after like ten years of schooling, then ok, I can accept that also. But just getting your bachelors degree or your masters… yeah no one really cares. If your facebook friends with your mom, I’m sure she’d care. But she’s really the only one.

I saw a facebook status today that simply said “out.” When the hell did facebook statuses replace the away message?!

So yeah, if I see another person announce on facebo0ok that they are graduating… I’m gonna lose my shit.

God dammit, I need a nightcap. Where’s my whiskey at?

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