So There’s a Kid From My Town on American Idol

I live in Merrick. I also write for the local Merrick newspaper.

Nothing ever happens here.


I’ll write about a class that donated 30 care packages overseas to troops, or a Merrick resident that got a DWI, or a high school sports team that is having a good year. Nothing too exciting.

So, you can only imagine my excitement when I discovered yesterday that a Merrick resident will be on this season’s American Idol! And even better, I actually know the kid. Not personally, but he plays on the school baseball team and I have covered many of their games in the past, and even interviewed him after some of them.

Not only is he on the show, but he actually makes it to the top 40! That is when the show becomes live. If you saw his audition last night, it’s pretty easy to tell that he will be a member of the top 12.

I thought, finally, I can have a story here that not just fifty people want to read, but something the whole nation could be interested in. I could have my big break, and I could ride this kid’s coattails to the big time!

So, I actually went to work early yesterday (early for me that is, I was still an hour late), and was eager to start making calls to get in touch with him to write a nice feature story. I searched his name in the white pages, but could not find it. Next, I called the school and left a message with the principal.

Two hours later, the principal had not called me back. That’s when the thought started to occur to me… what if he’s not allowed to talk to the media? FOX is a major corporation, and could have strict P.R guidelines.

I called back the principal, and my worst fears were confirmed. He told me that several news outlets have already reached out to him, and he’s told them all the same thing: that he — Robbie Rosen is the kid’s name — is not allowed to talk. I responded by trying to play the local angle, and that we just want to do a nice profile on him, and that we didn’t have to discuss the show. He told me he would call his mother again and tell her that, and also give me my number.

They never got back to me.

In a last-ditch effort, I found his email address on facebook and sent him an email. I’m not expecting anything.

Somebody from Merrick finally accomplishes something that garners national attention, and I’m not even allowed to fucking write about it. Are you kidding me?

I’m sure once he’s off the show I’ll be able to do a nice piece on him. But, by then, every news outlet in the world will be trying to talk to him — if he does really well on the show, that is.

I’m probably going to have to end up doing some shitty piece where I get his friends and teachers to comment on him. And his 4th grade piano teacher. No one will give a shit about that.

Oh well, I guess I’ll have to wait a little longer for my big break…

Lets’ move, on shall we? Why am i even asking? No one is reading this.

Reason #15639 why I hate America:

This is hysterical. A lady was texting while walking at the mall, and she was so distracted that she fell straight into a giant fountain. The not so funny part? She is contemplating legal action because “nobody helped her after she fell.”


Bitch, just take the “L” and move on. You failed.

The best quote from her: “I realized that I was falling when I was in the water.”

Again… Wow. No words.

What is she suing for?! Being a fucking moron? At least I could be satisfied by the fact that she will make no money out of this, and will be further humiliated and embarrassed by attracting more attention her way. But the fact that there is actually a lawyer out there that was willing to take on this case… well, he should have his law degree stripped. Immediately.

One more awesome video:

Don’t even need to comment on that one. It speaks for itself.

Oh, and I should also mention that it was announced yesterday that Anne Hathaway will be playing Catwoman in the next batman movie. Anne Hathaway in tight leather clothing? Oh my. Let’s just say that I won’t have a tough time looking for inspiration when I masturbate later.

Alright, that’s enough from me. Have a good weekend everybody, be safe, and for the third straight week… GO JETS!!!!!!!!!

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