Is it Too Early to Start Bashing Valentine’s Day?

Amazingly, the first month of 2011 is coming to a close and we are just a few short hours away from February.

When we look back on January, we will remember one thing about it: snow. Lots of it. And believe it or not, I just heard on the news an hour ago that another storm is expected this week. So expect a lot more complaining about it from people on Facebook. But anyway, now we can look onwards towards February.

The shortest month of the year, February is significant for a few reasons. In baseball, pitchers and catches report this month. It’s also black history month. The Oscars occur in February. And of course, right smack dab in the middle of February is the single most important holiday of the year —

Forget Christmas (the birthday of Jesus Christ), Thanksgiving (the uniting of the pilgrims and the Native Americans) or Independence Day (the anniversary of our country gaining its independence from Great Britain), those holidays pale in comparison to Valentine’s Day. Nothing is more important than this day. At least that is what any women will tell you.

Here are the guarantees of what will occur on Valentine’s Day/

1) Women in relationships will feel a completely undeserved and unearned sense of importance and entitlement — and will let you know on Facebook.

2) Single women will feel depressed and lonely — and will let you know on Facebook.

3) There will be many pictures of candy and flowers posted on Facebook.

4) Guys will not give a shit.

5) A terrible movie will be released (see last year: “Valentine’s Day,” one of the biggest pieces of crap I’ve ever seen.)

6) I will be avoiding Facebook on this day.

It’s not even that I hate the idea of Valentine’s Day. If a guy and a girl really are experiencing true love, and want to have a day to celebrate that love, then kudos to them. I’m happy for you guys.

But, just the idea that girls place so much importance on Valentine’s Day, and expect so much out of their male counterparts, and require so much fucking attention, sickens me to my core.

Also, it’s a fake holiday. Nothing happened on February 14th. The date is insignificant. It is a date that was picked so that we as people could be brainwashed and manipulated into thinking that it has significance. If you want to pick a day to be romantic and celebrate your love, then why not the anniversary of the day you met? How could the day of your fucking anniversary not be as important as an arbitrary date that has zero actual significance?

It just gives girls an excuse to wake up one morning and be think: “Nothing should be more important than me.” Which is what they want to think every day, of course (and do.)

We have plenty of excuse to celebrate other holidays, like the ones I mentioned above. We are actually celebrating something. And for a reason. The dates of other holidays are not arbitrary.

Who pushes and promotes Valentine’s Day (other than women)? Hallmark does. And Jewelry companies. How many times have you seen commercials lately with a voice-over saying “This Valentine’s Day, buy her…” They are manipulating us. They know we are stupid, and that we will buy into whatever shit they spew at us, and they want us to celebrate the holiday so that they will make money. And we do. And they do.

Like I said, I’m all for love and happiness. But not Valentine’s Day. If such a day exists where we have to appease and satisfy our female partners nonstop throughout a 24-hour period, then why doesn’t a day exist where we get to ignore them for a 24-hour period?

Oh wait, that day does exist. It’s called every other day of the year.

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