It’s time to talk about the hipster glasses

I understand that fashion changes and evolves on a regular basis, and that one day something will be hip and cool and then a week later a new thing will be hip and cool. I myself don’t make much of an effort to stay with the latest trends. Honestly, what is the point? If it changes so quickly, why bother?

However, that doesn’t mean I don’t notice the new trends. Some of them I could appreciate, and some of them make me shake my head. I remember about a year ago, when the giant sunglasses were in that covered half of girls’ faces. I honestly thought that was the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen, and even thinking about it now still pisses me off.

Well, what is the fashion trend of 2012 that pisses me off?

This:

The thick-rimmed black hipster glasses.

I thought glasses were supposed be subtle, refined pieces of apparel that were meant to be individually suited towards each person. That way, when people look at you, the glasses look so natural that you don’t even notice them.

Conversely, these giant black glasses stand out so blatantly like a giant pimple on the front of your nose. They are a monstrosity.

I’m not entirely sure how they started. At first, I noticed a lot of basketball players were wearing them. Like these guys:

But then, suddenly, celebrities started wearing them too!

What the heck is going on in the world? Is everybody in show business really that big of a poser?

“Oh my God! That dude is wearing black thick-rimmed glasses! I guess I have to do it too!”

Glasses are meant to be a practical tool. We wear them because we need to see. Although, I’m not that naive that I don’t understand that people want to look fashionable. If you’re going to wear glasses on your face, you might as well make sure they look good.

But these new glasses are just absurd, and they make everybody look extremely nerdy. And that reminds me where I had seen these glasses before, prior to this new trend!

That’s right. It’s gotten to the point where people are actually mimicking Steve Urkel.

If I see somebody wearing these glasses, I have no problem superficially labeling them as an asshole. I really don’t need to know anything further about them. They are wearing these glasses, so therefore they are an asshole. It is pretty simple.

And the worst part with these celebrities is that they are all rich as hell. So if they experience difficulties with their vision, then they could get the most effective and up-to-date contact lenses on the market. They don’t even need to be wearing glasses. But not only do they wear them, but they wear the most noticeable, douchy ones they could get their hands on. It’s painfully obvious that they do it just for attention.

Heck, I bet that most of these people don’t even have actual prescription glasses. The glass is probably clear. It really would not surprise me.

Of course, I suppose if you are rich and popular, you can have the mindset that anything you wear is going to become a trend. I bet if Lebron James wore denim shorts one day, then idiots across America would be wearing them by the following week. Though I don’t know why anyone would want to mimic Lebron James anyway, unless they have aspirations of being a career loser and choke artist.

I am someone who has always wore glasses my entire life. I have crappy vision, and I never wanted contact lenses because I have a phobia when it comes to touching my eyes. So I wear glasses whenever I need to, which is pretty much always. I enjoy glasses. But now, because of these hipsters, I am going to be labeled as a poser. And if there is anything I am not, it is a poser.

The giant sunglasses fizzled out, thankfully, and we can only pray that the hipster glasses will do the same.

If there is a God up there, please grant me that wish. Also, let me sleep with Kate Upton. Actually, yeah, grant that one first.

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3 thoughts on “It’s time to talk about the hipster glasses

  1. I totally agree… I am tired of them being labeled “geek” glasses too…when half the people who wear them have no idea what it means to be a geek! >_<

  2. It started with The Closer. She was so beautiful but when she really needed to see something, she would pull out these ugly black glasses, or, that’s where I first saw it, then celebs were wearing them on awards ceremonies. All over. I think they are hideous but as mentioned by someone else, what is it that makes people follow a trend as if it were a disease, or sheep going to slaughter. They do look good on a few people and there are some great variations in style, but I feel,so,much better knowing that other people hate the mindless following of them.

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