I just can’t bring myself to become excited about a superhero movie

I’m not sure if any of you are aware of this, but a new movie comes out tomorrow. It’s called the Dark Knight Rises.

It’s the third and final installment of the rebooted Batman trilogy spearheaded by director Christopher Nolan and actor Christian Bale, who plays the dark-winged vigilante.

I’ve already heard people talking en masse about how they already got tickets, or how they are planning to see it in IMax, or how they have every intention to see it over the weekend, and bunch of other things that I really couldn’t give two shits about.

Superhero movies can be fun. I enjoyed the first two Spiderman movies with Tobey Maguire. I liked the first Iron Man. Obviously Batman Begins was good too, as was Dark Knight — albeit a bit overrated.

But they’re all pretty much the same. A regular dude either gains some type of deformity through an extravagant circumstance that gives him abilities to do things other humans cannot, or some other regular dude undergoes tragedy at a young age, and gets trained by some Asian guy all the way up in the Swiss Alps, only to return to his hometown to seek vengeance.

Conveniently, some other dude gains some type of superhuman ability through an equally as extravagant circumstance, but his superhuman abilities mess with his head and skew his perception. He subsequently tries to take over the world.

The first regular dude — who is now irregular — must now stop him.

Of course there is a love interest, and the love interest is someone who the superhero knew before he gained his abilities and/or powers. Has anyone ever realized that? Comic book/super hero movies are actually a lot more romantic than people think. They emphasize the power of first love.

When Peter Parker gained his powers, or when Bruce Wayne became a master ninja, they could get any chick they want. And yet, they still want that first love. It’s quite beautiful.

But of course, they can’t be with them because they must protect them from danger. And that’s another nice romantic angle — the willingness to sacrifice for the ones they love.

And finally, plenty of action will be thrown in, some car chases and even a little bit of humor.

Voila!

So when people say that they think The Dark Knight Rises is going to be the best movie ever, I kind of laugh inside. But outwardly I just smile and say, “It will be good, I’m sure.”

Christopher Nolan certainly has done a good job with the films. If you’ve ever seen any of his other works, like Inception, Memento, or The Prestige, then you know what he is capable of. When a movie is in such capable hands as his, then it can only be good.

As for me? I have no current plans to see it, but I’m sure it’s all everybody is going to be talking about for the next month, so I’ll really have no choice but to see it just so I know what the hell people are talking about. But I’m definitely not dropping $20 bucks to see it in IMax. No siree Bob.

Anyway, while Batman revolutionizes the fictional world that is Gotham City, let’s talk about things that are revolutionizing the actual world that we live in.

I remember hearing long ago about how Google was working on a project to create glasses that actually serve as a mini-computer. You access it by talking to it, and you see the screen on the corner of the lens.

Well now apparently there is a prototype. 

This new wearable technology will basically consist of a pair of clever glasses which contain a display, a camera, a microphone, and everything necessary to make some sci-fi fantasies come true. (But keep in mind that the Project Glass designs are simply ideas, not final products at this point though.)

So what will you do with a pair of these strange glasses?

Well, you might wake up, slip on your Google glasses and set some calendar alerts before looking up directions to your first meeting of the day. While walking to your destination, you may pause to snap a photo of a funny sign (which you instantly share with your friends via a social media service of your choice) or find a coffee shop. Later you could start a video-chat with a friend and show him or her your current view.

And you’d do all of this without ever reaching for a computer or smartphone. You’d simply speak or tap a button on the glasses and the appropriate actions commence.

If you told me about this five years ago, I’d have been in shock and awe with this invention. But with the way technology has evolved recently, I’m really not that amazed by this. I think it’s absolutely awesome, but it just seems like the next logical step.

You can click on the link for a video sample of how the glasses are meant to work, but it’s laughable to think that they will be that easy to function. Remember the iPhone fiasco? When it came out, Apple users fell into a 72-hour state of confusion, not even knowing how to unlock their phones. Well, I imagine it would take a hell of a lot longer to manage this device than an iPhone. Also, I can’t even begin to fathom how much it will cost. An iPad runs for $800 these days. So I can’t see these glasses costing much less than, say, $1,200.

I’ll pass and stick to my regular subscription glasses for now.

Before I head out for the weekend, I need to publicize the fact that I have officially become a fan of women’s hurdling.

No, it’s not because I respect the abilities of athletes who can dash full speed, leap over objects, maintain their speed, and repeat the process several times without even breaking a sweat. It’s because of a girl named Michelle Jenneke.

Just watch.

She is a 19-year-old Australian, and simply from this clip — awful background music notwithstanding — one can conclude that she is not only sexy as hell, but fun, free-spirited, super athletic and a good freaking dancer.

Plus she has a free reign to hurdle me anytime.

#SEX JOKE!

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