Facebook is getting creepier by the day

As far as delving into people’s personal lives, Facebook knows no bounds. Every addition that Facebook makes — which seems weekly at this point — adds some type of interesting new quirk to the social networking conglomerate.

Whether it’s the addition of the cover photo, or the stylistic changes of your photos, or the positioning of posts on your wall; these changes are done mostly to enhance the aesthetics of Facebook. However, no changes that Facebook implements ever add more security to its users. If anything, it does the opposite and makes our pages and information more open for other people to access.

Facebook is very sneaky. They know that the more stir they create among the world, the more relevant they become. So they don’t care about privacy.

Additionally, Mark Zuckerberg is no fool. He knows exactly why Facebook is so popular. Do you remember in The Social Network, when Jesse Eisenberg [as Mark Z] had his moment of catharsis? It was after he created Face Mash, and put pictures of his female classmates online for people to vote upon.

It exploded. The popularity was unrivaled and proceeded to crash Harvard’s servers. It was then, that Jesse aka Mark made his ultimate, billion dollar realization — people don’t just want to see pictures on the Internet, they want to see pictures of people that they know.

Flash forward several years later. Facebook is still at the top, and it’s because of Mark Zuckerberg’s accurate foresight — what this world craves is stalkerability. People desperately want to know what is happening in everybody else’s lives. They want to know everything. They want to compare, contrast, mock, applaud, and most importantly — just be aware.

That doesn’t apply to everybody, of course, but the majority of people. And that is why Facebook is, and will continue to be, so popular.

But that being said, I think Facebook has officially taken things a little too far with its latest addition. Apparently, behind closed doors, the Facebook team added couples pages.

In addition to having your own individual Facebook page, you can now have a page that details your entire romantic relationship with another person. It will include your photos, your significant life events and your wall posts that include the two of you.

So for those who like to stalk, this is now your dream come true — to stalk two people at once.

Immediate reports, like the link I posted, and this one, talk about how poorly received this new feature has been since its installation.

I imagine that girls will find it enjoyable, and it will now give them more incentive to post on their boyfriend’s or husband’s walls. And to be honest, that was always something that bothered me a little bit. Most people in serious relationships live together. And yet, they still post on each other’s walls. It always makes me shake my head because I never knew what purpose it served.

But now, it serves a purpose.

The question becomes, though — what happens when these couples break up? The couples page doesn’t just go away. For example, I’m sure a Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez couples page is still floating around on the Internet somewhere.

The obvious response to that question is that one of the scorned lovers will most likely delete the couples page immediately following the break-up. Breaking up with your significant other is as embarrassing as it is, with all this publicity. When you sever a “relationship status” on Facebook, it automatically sends out an alert to people’s Newsfeeds that you are now single.

Humorously, a trend I’ve noticed upon breakups is the female actually deleting their Facebook page altogether for a little while just to avoid all communication and exposure. They go totally off the grid.

So to have an entire page devoted entirely to your relationship, even after you break up, well, that’s just adding insult to injury, isn’t it? It’s asking for trouble, and the honchos at Facebook knew that. They just don’t care.

What’s my personal opinion on it? Honestly, I don’t really care. It got to a point a long time ago where absolutely nothing Facebook does surprises me anymore. In fact, I think we’ve only seen the tip of the iceberg with how far Facebook will go to violate and expose our private lives even further.

But the fact that Facebook has done this so quietly, without any public announcement, is what amuses me. It clearly tells me that they knew this would not be popularly received. But they went ahead and did it anyway.

At the end of the day, it’s just another reason to stay single.

The other reason? Girls hate me.

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