I never before said the words “the future is now” until I saw this.

I can’t think of a more cheesy statement to make than saying “the future is now.”

It’s cliché, unoriginal and it doesn’t really mean anything. Besides, at the rate that technology is advancing, nothing should surprise us anymore. I mean, we’ve been cloning animals for a decade now. I can record live television through my smart phone now. And for Christ’s sake, computers are starting to be made in glasses now.

So saying that “the future is now” is pretty much meaningless. The future has been here for a while, and technology will continue to advance at a rapid rate while humans continue dwelling this Earth.

But then I saw this photo.

Bendable phones

Upon seeing this photo, you don’t even need to know exactly what you’re looking at to be impressed. It’s so abnormal that it will take you brain a few seconds to process it, but even during those few seconds you still know you are looking at something awesome.

These mysterious objects are new bendable phones that are being developed by several phone companies, but rumor has it than Samsung will be the first to reveal it.

So you can actually, like, bend this phone… and it won’t break. You can roll it up into a ball… and it won’t break. You can break it… and it won’t break.

Color me impressed.

I’m still not entirely sure what actual practical purpose they serve — will its bendyness actually make it fit better within your pocket? And will the phone even possess the same capabilities as bigger, non-bendy phones?

But shoving aside the practicality — there is no questioning the aesthetics of this device. It just looks freaking awesome. I really can’t imagine this not being a huge success if and when it is ever released, which could be as early as next year.

Also, if some hot chick like Kate Upton put the phone to her face, would the phone suddenly become fully erect? Sorry, couldn’t resist.

Well, there are other things in this world that make you realize how far this world has come. We like to think that the United States is the pioneer when it comes to new technologies, but we’re really not. After all, the aforementioned Samsung is a Korean company. And a South Korean company, at that.

Well, before I give any further description — let me just show you this picture.

swimming poolswimming pool2

swimming pool4So these photos are of the biggest swimming pool in the entire world, and it is located at the San Alfonso del Mar Resort in Chile. The pool holds 66 million gallons of water and is as big as 20 Olympic-sized swimming pools. It is more than twice the length of the world’s next biggest outdoor pool.

I can’t even imagine how hard it must be to clean and maintain this thing. And I don’t even try to imagine that, because I am too busy imagining what it would actually be like to swim in that pool.

If I was rich, and money was not an issue for me, I would book a trip to Chile moments after seeing these photos.

I would glance upon the photos, stare at them for a few seconds, and before I even have any type of physical reaction, I would load up Expedia.com and book the flight and hotel. It would be done in three minutes, and then I would go back to watching porn, or whatever else I was doing before I was looking at these pool photos.

People post photos on Facebook from their vacations all of the time. They do it to invoke jealousy upon their Facebook friends. They post a picture, and the caption will say something like, “This is the life!” and then they’ll tag the beach or whatever exotic location that they’re at. But the subtext of that Facebook post is really, “Haha, look where I am right now bitches!”

Kate Upton bikini2

Well, I think that if I posted a Facebook photo of myself while at this pool, then I would win. I win the competition of jealousy-invoking Facebook photos. Nobody would attempt to do it anymore after that, because they couldn’t top me.

And since this is a complete and utter pipe dream, and will never happen, then I can also envision that if I am ever at this pool in my lifetime, that Kate Upton will be on a float next to me. Hey, it’s a fictional dream, so I can fantasize about it however the hell I want.

If you’re going to dream, dream big, am I right?

I need a cold shower.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s