I remember when I used to log onto Facebook and read the collection of statuses on my News Feed, only to see a wildly diverse collection of thoughts.
Suddenly, I knew who my optimistic friends were. Who my pessimistic friends were. Who my secretly funny friends were. Who my friends were where I’d read their status and say, “Maybe somebody should help them?”
I found that most statuses were more negative than positive. This is simply because negative people tend to be more attention-seeking, where as people who are more content with their life don’t need such an outlet.
I hated this. I’m a positive person myself, and I don’t like seeing people complain incessantly. I never told anybody that, but I always thought it. All of the whining, grumbling and bellyaching made me start to hate Facebook.
A few years later, now that most of my friends are in their late-20s, I find myself missing that time.
Because at least they were actual thoughts. Regardless of what I thought of them.
Now when I log onto Facebook, all I see is link after link of Buzzfeed posts, viral videos, quiz results and whatever other bullshit website is trying to capitalize on the social media boom. And the link is always accompanied by some mundane comment that doesn’t help the situation.
Link: “42 reasons you know you’ve lived in New York City too long”
Comment: “All of these define my life.”
Link: “I got Anna! Which Frozen character are you?”
Comment: “I wanted to get Olaf! But this is good too!”
Link: “This person’s reaction to this prank will make your day!”
Comment: Oh my God this made me cry! [Tagged friend] will love this!!!
Here’s a link for you guys: NOBODYCARES.COM.
My annoyance of these links might be amplified by the fact that Facebook’s new design makes pictures double the size than they used to be, and consequently, they take up nearly my entire screen when I’m perusing my News Feed.
It’s made me realize what I need Facebook for. It’s because I need my
daily hourly minutely fix of raw, human emotion. At least I can say that about the long gone “FML phase.” Most statuses may have been immature and unflattering, but they were real.
Now checking my News Feed is equal to scrolling through a generic social media entertainment website.
I don’t want a BuzzFeed list — I want to know why somebody is pissed off at 2:30 on a Thursday afternoon. I want somebody talking about how excited they are for the weekend to come. I want a picture of somebody’s cat doing something adorable.
Bring me my old Facebook, God damn it.