How Tinder has changed the dating scene

It’s been almost one year since I joined Tinder. And obviously, since I’m so open and critical about it, it means it hasn’t worked yet. I have yet to meet my “one and only.” My one and only what, exactly, who knows.

During the Tinder boom of 2013, people joined with the excuse that they were “experimenting.” They said they weren’t taking it seriously but wanted to see what it’s all about.

Guys, it’s been a year. You’re not experimenting anymore.

At first, Tinder was just an additional means of playing the field. A fun, noncommittal way to seek out single people in your area. Or at the very least, a way to work on your text game.

One year later, I think more and more people are accepting Tinder as a legitimate way to find a significant other.

Tinder2What you don’t want it to become, however — and I’m worried this is the case for me — is for Tinder to be your primary means of courting.

At times, I’ve found myself inside of a bar, and instead of actually gazing around the room in search of girls to potentially speak to, I whip out my phone and go on Tinder.

That’s not good.

Yes, it is fun to drunk Tinder. There’s no doubt about that. But as somebody who has always been reluctant to boldly walk up to a girl and introduce myself, I’ve found that the existence of Tinder only serves as a further excuse to avoid doing it.

And that’s something on a personal level that worries me a bit — that Tinder’s inception will no longer make me feel the need to pursue girls in the flesh. And I mean that metaphorically. But eventually physically. That’s the whole goal.

So girls who were always skeptical about meeting the man of their dreams inside of a bar, now you have more reason to be.

What I won’t say — at least not yet — is that Tinder has become the lowest format for flirting. For years, I’ve voiced my discontent with how text messaging replaced phone calls when asking a girl out, but I can’t say that Tinder has replaced text messaging, because it’s a totally different context.

If you’re texting a girl, it means you’ve at least met in person and obtained her phone number. With Tinder, however, the girls (or guys) you match with did not exist in your life until moments before. And that obviously affects how you converse, and therein lies the difference.

On a more positive note, I do think that more and more people will form relationships via Tinder, once you learn to weed through all of the weirdos. It also caters to older single people whose increased commitment towards work prevents them from getting out as much as they’d like.

So for better or worse, Tinder has definitely left an indelible mark on the dating scene.

It’s made already petrified guys even more terrified, but, by golly, our ability to wittily text is only becoming more and more immaculate.

Girls, eat you heart out.

One thought on “How Tinder has changed the dating scene

  1. Wow, I am really glad I am (happily) married. It must be really rough out there! Hang in there, I met my husband unexpectedly at an Anti-Valentine’s Day party. You just never, ever know!

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