Obama’s last State of the Union, El Chapo, and a Friends reunion!

President Obama stood at a lectern Tuesday night for just under an hour to deliver his final State of the Union address.

As an avid Obama supporter, I am obviously biased. But I don’t see how people could disagree with the overarching message that he aimed to deliver.

When we are united, we are better. That’s what he emphasized. America is not run by Congress, but by its people.

It was a comforting speech during a time when many in the political spectrum are trying to cultivate a sense of fear and anger for their own personal gain.

Obama SOTU 2016.jpgOf course, there were issues he brought up that don’t have full support in Congress: climate change, health care, the war on terror.

Not everyone may love him, but I think history will be very, very kind to Obama. And I, for one, will miss him when he’s gone. *Cue Cups song by Anna Kendrick*

On that note, let me move on to my favorite black president to my favorite Mexican drug lord. El Chapo. Which, incidentally, is the same name I would choose to give a Mexican teddy bear if I ever happened to own one.

That’s me dropping a souvenir hint for any of my friends who visit Mexico in the near future.

The man whose empire has exceeded that of Pablo Escobar’s, and who has already escaped from Mexican prison twice in ways that would be astonishing even if it was in a movie, was captured yet again.

And it happened right after he did a front page interview for Rolling Stone Magazine. With the actor Sean Penn.

On the surface, it may seem unethical to interview and cooperate with one of the world’s most wanted men while he’s on the run from the El Chapo Sean Penn.pngMexican and American government. But as a former journalist, this is the type of interview you want to do in your lifetime. One that not only tells an epic story, but involves major risks and secrecy. When the process of even getting the interview is just as exciting as the interview itself, that’s when you know it’s special.

It’s just slightly disheartening that a man whose never been associated with journalism was the one to do it.

Darn it. Outdone by Sean Penn. Again. Few people know this, but I was actually the runner-up to play the role of Harvey Milk in the 2008 film, Milk, which earned Penn an Oscar.

The second runner-up? A carton of 2% milk.

Don’t fact check any of that. Just go with it.

Let me transition one more time to my all-time favorite sitcom: the show whose famous lead-in song is known by everyone, yet the band that sang it is not. I know the name, though, but I’m not going to tell you. Do your own research. For once.

It’s The Rembrandts.

Friends showAnyway, the cast of Friends is reuniting. It’s exciting news, although it isn’t in the way everyone hoped. Rachel, Ross, Chandler, Monica, Joey ad Phoebe won’t be starring in a new episode soon, but they will come together for an NBC special next month honoring famous sitcom director James Burrows. They’ll be one of several famous sitcom casts who will be present.

Sorry James, it’s supposed to be your night, but all anyone cares about is seeing our favorite TV Manhattanites together again. In this case, no one will be there for you, whether the rain starts to fall or not.

I miss the days when I used to watch an episode of Friends at 11 p.m. on a school night before falling asleep.

It may not be on at that time anymore, but if you are reading this at 11 p.m. EST on Wednesday, or anytime after, then congratulations. It means you didn’t win Powerball.

You’re welcome.

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Because I can’t even talk about the State of the Union without bringing up Taylor Swift

The State of the Union address is one of the few American presidential traditions that still exists.

George Washington gave the first such speech before a joint session in congress about 225 years ago. Thomas Jefferson discontinued the act of delivering the address in person 30 years later, but in 1913, Woodrow Wilson reestablished the live speech, and it’s mostly continued that way ever since.

(Thanks, Wikipedia!)

Barack Obama delivered his sixth State of the Union address last night. It was the lowest-rated address in 15 years, but nonetheless, contained its usual antics of faux bipartisanship, an abundance of standing ovations, and Obama SOTUthe president touting the successes he’s experienced during his term.

The most memorable of the moment was a zinger delivered by Obama, about three quarters through the speech, when he began a sentence saying “I have no more campaigns to run…” which was a met with a sarcastic applause by House Republicans, who now outnumber Democrats by a substantial margin.

Obama smirked, and without hesitation, responded: “I know, because I won both of them.”

BAM. SHOTS FIRED. OWNED. SWISH. OTHER EXPRESSIONS TO CONVEY CONQUEST IN ALL CAPS.

Seriously though, it was a sweet moment for Barry O., and one that must have given him great satisfaction. It’s pretty crazy to believe in two years from now, we will be swearing in a new president.

I remember clearly where I was, six years ago, the moment I learned Obama was to be our next president. I was literally in the shittiest bar near my university, in upstate Binghamton, called the Rathskeller, which is located in the basement of another bar. I was engaged in a vicious beer pong tournament when the emcee stopped the music for a second and said, “Guys, it’s official — Barack Obama won the presidential election.”

I turned to the TV, saw Obama waving, shrugged, and immediately returned to my beer pong game. I probably got drunk enough that I threw up later that night.

Man, does time fly.

Obama has one more State of the Union left, and I expect him to bring it on like Kirsten Dunst in a cheerleader movie.

By the way, you all know who John Boehner is, right? If not, he was the dude over Obama’s left shoulder with the ridiculously orange tan who looked miserable throughout the entire speech. Because he’s a Republican.

Just in case you were wondering if you should take him seriously or not as a politician — or even as a human being — it’s worth noting that, last week, he responded to Obama’s proposal to provide free tuition to community college students by…

by…Taylor Swift happy

…wait for it…

USING TAYLOR SWIFT GIFS.

The presiding officer of the House of Representatives actually retorted to a presidential proposal using 13 digital images conveying different emotions expressed by Taylor Swift, to help prove his point.

How Boehner and his staff managed to even secure all of these different images of Taylor Swift, I do not know.

I’m all for bringing Taylor Swift into any conversation, regardless of the topic, but when you’re the third most powerful person in government, and do it — 13 times — it’s probably not the most strategic or wisest maneuver in order to be taken seriously.

But if I know Obama, I’m sure he handled it the same way he did the snarky applause during his State of the Union address.

By shaking it off.